Burton St. John, an assistant professor in the communication and theatre arts department at Old Dominion University, came to us with a handfull of student papers and asked if we would like to post them online.

Since we needed an example to kick off Student Voices, we decided to use the papers Saint John shared with us. The first is a piece on sex ed by Ashley Jarvis.

The Quiet Side of Sex

By Ashley Jarvis, 21,

Old Dominion University senior

Virginia Beach high schools have seen more than warning signs.

One afternoon in 2000, two young ladies and a long trail of boys lined up in the Bayside High School dugout, where they performed oral sex. A couple years later, a female student delivered a baby in a toilet at First Colonial High School. Cox High School was not far behind with students having sex in cars on school property during school hours.  

Mortified is probably the best word to describe the school system each time a sex scandal occurs. Why, then, do Virginia Beach City Public Schools refuse to acknowledge teenage sexual activity in the Family Life curriculum?

Sex is not nearly as taboo as in former generations. Media, politics, and entertainment venues are all crawling with sexual scenes, scandals and languages.

“I cannot imagine that we live in a society where people are still intimidated by sex,” said Old Dominion University student Stephanie Bollinger, 21, “It is virtually everywhere you look.”

Traditionally, Sexual Education programs taught abstinence as the only means of contraception as well as the right moral decision. Today, many school districts across the United States and globe are pursuing other options.  In September 2007, New York joined ten other states including California, Connecticut, Rhode Island and New Jersey in refusing millions of dollars in federal grant money for abstinence only education.

The UK employs curricula which include topics ranging from oral sex and contraception methods to STD’s and pregnancy. Montgomery County School District in Maryland included homosexual sex and alternative sex methods in the 2007 curriculum for 8th, 9th and 10th grade students. In Alexandria, Virginia, the Health Department introduced a new program this fall to help reduce teen pregnancy. The program involved afterschool activities and classes in which life skills are taught to dissuade teenagers from risky behaviors which often lead to sex.

Could Virginia Beach be so far behind the curve with regards to sexual education?

William Deck, the Coordinator of Elementary Health and Physical Education & Family Life suggested that “Virginia Beach is a very transient and Baptist based community. A liberal change could occur with an increase of public knowledge regarding what is or is not being taught.”

Norfolk and Hampton are already steps ahead by teaching contraception methods. The conservative portrait of Virginia Beach is heavily reflected in the curriculum. With the school board possessing final authority over the program, public opinion will be key to driving change. But Virginia Beach might still be afraid to cross that line.

According to VA Health.org and the division of statistics, VA Beach alone had 845 teen pregnancies in 2005. “Sex is clearly happening, and at younger and younger ages. The issues our society is facing are nothing new, in fact they have been around for years,” said Ashley McLeod, 34, a local mother of two and PTA President for Old Donation Center for the Gifted and Talented.

The Virginia Beach City Public Schools Family Life Education program oversees sexual education. The State of Virginia does not mandate that a school system must teach sexual education or provide mandated lessons. School districts may adopt the state wide program or develop one on a local level. According to Deck, “Sexual Education programs are more often a reflection of the local community; therefore Virginia Beach’s program is extremely conservative in nature.”

The current guidelines for Virginia Beach lessons date back to January 2002. The school board revises the curriculum every six years, meaning that the program is not due for review until the 2008-2009 school year. Parents, teachers and clergy members make up the committee which reports proposed programs and changes to the school board.

“Virginia Beach does require that all Family Life teachers are certified by the state to ensure that absolutely no deviation occurs from the written curriculum,” explained Deck, “Virginia Beach also adopts all 12 of the state’s main points for sexual education, however, we do not cover all the topics in as much detail as the state outlines.”

With less than a one percent opt out rate, it is clear that parents do want their children to be taught sexual education matters.  The big question at hand is what to teach them. Sex is often a topic dreaded by parents for discussion with their children. Even worse is the fear teens feel about going to their parents with questions. “I could never talk to my parents about sex.

"I tried to talk to my mom once and she freaked out because she thought that meant I was automatically having sex,” said Jennifer Jones (a pseudonym), 16, a sophomore at Princess Anne High School. Family life should be the arena that students like Jones are able to gather information for safe decisions.

“Family life is kind of a joke here,” said Phil Smith (a pseudonym), 17, a senior at Kempsville High School. “I grew up in Europe and teen pregnancy is not nearly as much of an issue because sex and birth control are open topics,” said Smith.

A major concern seen in Virginia Beach’s conservative nature is the perception that birth control and other such topics cannot be taught without encouraging or accepting teenage sexual activity. However, some teachers find a way to discuss birth control, STD’s, and the risks of oral sex without “promoting” any sexual activity to teens. Curiosity, knowledge and fear together can go a long way.

“Since I can discuss the health side of STD’s, I always describe to the boys exactly how STD test, are performed for males. The very thought of the pain and process often makes them squirm in their chairs. At that point, I feel like I might have found a way to help prevent such risky sexual behaviors,” described Christopher Felton, a PE and Family Life teacher at Bayside High School in Virginia Beach.

Deck shared his experiences as a family life instructor in Warren and Fredrick Counties in Northern VA, as well as a parent.

“Teaching in Warren County, I had 99.9% of student attention during sexual education lessons. Students want this information, and we can provide it in an educational and not promotional way.”

He once taught self breast exams to a group of middle school girls and found they were maturely paying attention. His diligence extended to the home front.

“With my son, I discussed many aspects of sex and body parts after moving to the beach a few years ago” said Deck.

However, upon moving to Virginia Beach he found a lack of support and detail compared to other areas in Virginia.  In fact, many families are faced with supplementing the Beach’s curriculum when moving to the area. The weaknesses of the family life program may have more implications than the school board thinks. Because of the shortcomings within the Beach curriculum, students often turn to the grapevine.

“The problem is that not every child has a mother, father or trusted adult to confide in about sexual issues,” explained Gregor McLeod, 38, a father of two, “I may sit down with my son and talk with him about issues, but when the kid sitting next to him on the bus has parents who don’t talk with him, that is where problems develop.”

Often kids who do not get information from home or school will turn to the Internet, movies and even video games which do not depict reality on any scale. The grapevine effect is especially troubling to those parents and teachers who try and make a difference.

“Teaching Family Life in high school is an extremely frustrating process” described Felton. “As the certified teacher, I am bound to the words written out for me, however, many teachers and advisors outside of the health department are free to carry on sexual discussions.”

All this puts him in some difficult situations.

“An English teacher can talk for 90 minutes about sex and adultery after reading The Scarlet Letter, but if a student asks me about condoms or any other issue not related to abstinence or the health side of intercourse, I must refer them to their parents!”    The Beach curriculum seems repetitive. Many crucial topics such as contraceptive devices, oral sex, masturbation, and homosexual sex are not addressed. Only two extremes are depicted for students, holding hands or intercourse. Ranges of sexual behaviors are not discussed. An age-old belief is at work here -- if it is not discussed than it will not happen.

The past has always proven that keeping a subject quiet does not make it disappear. Bill Armstrong, 50, of Virginia Beach humorously stated his frustration with the curriculum by commenting “I guess President Clinton was right according to the Beach’s lesson plans, He didn’t have sex.”

“I try to guide students by stressing the respect aspect which accompanies sex and relationships” explained Felton. “I can hang posters and news articles regarding virginity and abstinence while communicating to students that there are consequences to having sex just as there are consequences to going out for the football team. ... The fact is that MTV, MySpace and peers are all providing ‘information’ that we don’t.

Entertainment and media arenas such as music videos or teen magazines portray negative and sometimes obscene sexual images that kids refer back to. “We need to provide students will all the tools for their toolbox, just as we try to do with every other subject,” he said.

It is clear from statistics that ninth grade is almost too late to begin discussing sex and birth control. VA Health.org pregnancy prevention statistics attribute 293 pregnancies to mothers under the age of 15, and 3,096 to ages 15-17 in Virginia during 2004.

“A continuation of sexual education materials continuously through middle and into the senior year of high schools is necessary. At the very least I think a life skills class should be mandatory for all high school students,” said McLeod as she cooked dinner for her family. She said, “I take advantage of every opportunity to teach my kids lessons,” like a Richmond science exhibit she and her family visited last summer.

Looking at news stories and neighboring school districts it is difficult to understand why the Beach is still stuck on an abstinence only plan.

“Many issues such as STD’s, birth control, alcohol and HIV are health matters now more than ever,” said Bollinger. “Everyone gets freaked out by MRSA, but not by a gonorrhea breakout in middle school. Kind of twisted don’t you think?”

“With a revision committee coming as 2008/2009 approaches, I sure know what committee I will be volunteering for next,” said McLeod as she looked at her husband. He shook his head and said, “I just can’t understand why more people don’t take a stand. I guess the extreme wings like Pat Robertson always lead the herd.”

Meanwhile the danger signs of ignorance regarding sex and its consequences can prove haunting, especially if Virginia Beach policies stay mired in the past.

“I will never forget the oral sex incident at Bayside. Kids thought it was hilarious. I was rather disgusted,” said Bollinger. “I only hope that my nieces and nephews are not being exposed to sexual scandals and rumors. I expect schools to teach them the information they need to face the peer pressure about sex.”

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