The Stationary Haddock

"A woman without a man is like a fish without a bicycle." Widely attributed to feminist Gloria Steinem in the 1970's, this quote was met by the male response: "Yes, but who needs a stationary haddock?" According to the Stationary Haddock, the answer to that question is: "four animals, for starters!"

The Stationary Haddock, formerly The Shopping Diet Chick, is raising two dogs and two birds in Norfolk. She has been compared to a peanut butter and jelly sandwich: sweet and nutty.

Category: Culture

Would You Date Your Doctor?

May 08

6:46 PM

Deb asked yesterday how women would feel about dating their doctors.

I say- why not? I mean, my plastic surgeon has already seen me naked, so hey, that's already “out there”. (Oh, and it was so awful, too. I stood there mumbling, "Gosh, this isn't uncomfortable at all!" Then I started whistling. I think it may have been that Life of Brian song.) Now the fact that a plastic surgeon sees naked women on a daily basis- I think that might bother me. Deb mentioned that she could never date an OBGYN. I don't even like going to a male OBGYN; I certainly couldn't date my OBGYN. Or any OBGYN for that matter. Ick. What kind of guy chooses to become one of those, anyway? It reminds me of that creepy old movie- remember? The twins who were evil OBGYNs with those twisted instruments?

What about a really hot general practioner? I'd have to switch to an old, frumpy one. I'm just too shy that way. I saw a not-that-cute-but-young doctor a few years ago and had to explain that I was taking herbal pills to um, “assist my colon with its daily functioning”. Soooooo embarrassing.

Now a dentist—that's a totally different story. I had a really hot dentist a few years ago. Do you recall this commercial? "Beach Ford; Barton Ford, Lincoln-Mercury…..WORLD CLASS!" O.k. there's the older dad Barton, an older son, and a younger son. That’s one good looking family… but the youngest one? Smokin’. And he has an identical twin brother who's a dentist practicing in VA Beach. Wow. I wondered what kind of dentist-lottery I won to get him. In any case, I got to see him quite often while getting a couple of crowns put in and I have to say, I didn’t mind going to the dentist at all. In fact, I looked forward to it! Then I got the phone call from my friend Jenn…"Haddock, terrible news. I just saw the paper and your dentist's getting married." Oh poo.

So here’s the bottom line: for me, I’d say it’s a yes to dentists, podiatrists, dermatologists, and physical therapists; a no to OBGYNs, proctologists, and general practitioners. Ladies?

View 2 comment(s) Link to post

Hi Shannon!

Submitted by Maria on Wed, 05/14/2008 at 1:49 pm.

I don't think I'd mind too much. It'd be like dating a car mechanic who lectures you about what you're doing or not doing to your car or a financial analyst who tells you how to invest, you know? Oh, and you can point out the huge lesion on the dermatologist's back when he gives you crap about your face!

Eww, no!

Submitted by eeyore1978 on Wed, 05/14/2008 at 11:40 am.

I would say no to all doctors because if I were to date them I'd be paranoid that they'd be dissecting everything on me. For example, if I dated my dermatologist... he'd lean in to kiss me, pause and go "Is that thing your nose new? It looks weird." *dies* Or if my dentist takes me out to dinner and I order a soda... "Shannon, do you know what all of that sugar is doing to your teeth?" Too close for comfort, I say!
PS, No I didn't email the paranormal lady about the Hallmark ghost. I want to, as do my coworkers (who are into the ghost hunting shows) but there is no way the boss would go for it!