Well, here again trying to give you guys the lowdown on 2 of the newest movies out this week the night before.  I still have tons of people who call and stop me in the hall to ask how I rate movies before they spend big bucks.  One day, we will have everyone reading PilotonLine.com which will be good for them and me.  Why?  Cuz at the mention of movies.... I will stop (pretty much) everything I'm doing to talk about the latest and greatest whether in the theater or on DVD.  Here's my thoughts on the 2 newest I had the privilege to see early. 

Pineapple Express:  My rating:  $6.50 (1.-10.).

"Pineapple" goes first.  It's not a deep movie and won't take long to clue you in on the general content. 

Seth Rogen is the nouveau comedy genius in Hollywood.  He's been around for a few years since writing for Sacha Baron Cohen in 'Da Ali G Show'.  He co-produced and acted in '40 Year-old Virgin'.  But until he slept with Katie Heigl in "Knocked Up", only his friends and relatives recognized him.  Now, with screenplays of "Superbad", "Drillbit Taylor", and "Pineapple Express", Rogen has hit the big-time.  Did you know he has 5 more projects either in the works or about completed from later this year through 2010?   At least he's proven that comedy can come from some place other than "Saturday Night Life" alumni.

This is a pot movie.... and ya know it's not about cooking!  I describe this to my many questioners as the "Cheech and Chong" movie of  2008.  Seth Rogen plays Dale Denton, a process server.  He's the phenomenal one that looks so ordinary he gets to all his subjects whether they are in surgery or just answering a doorbell.  The man enjoys his work.  It could also be because he's high every moment of the day. 

James Franco (can't believe he sank here from 'Spiderman' and 'Tristan and Isolde') plays the classic pothead, Saul Silver, who deals to Dale.  I had to look twice at the movie poster.  Long, stringy hair and goofy smile, with an IQ  of about 10....a caricature of the classic, dope dealer.  He's the only dealer in town with the ultimate in marijuana grown in such rare conditions that it's worth a fortune.  It's called "Pineapple Express". 

Now I can give you the 10-cent synopsis.  Gary Cole is big drug dealer, Ted Jones.  Dale has a subpoena to deliver.  But he's gotta finish that hit of "Pineapple Express".  As he sits in front of Ted's house, a cop (Rosie Perez) enters the house and together kill a member of the competition Chinese mob.  Right up against the full-length window, right in the head, blood all over the place -- about 6 shots or more between them.  So freaked out on pot and fear, Dale tries to peal out and ends up hitting the squad car behind him and the Cadillac in front... over and over and over.  He manages to get away just before being ID'd but wait....he threw the pot he was smoking out the window.  (Hint:  it's rare and only one guy's got any.)

Dale goes to Saul and the comedy of 2 potheads commences.  There's 2 hitmen sent to find the 2 anti-heroes.  When Dale and Saul skip before they can reach Saul's apartment, they go after Saul's dealer . Red, played by another goofball, Danny R. McBride.  The guys have tons of misadventures trying to save their own hides. 

Briefly:  Saul and Dale end up in the woods overnight afraid of being assassinated.  Cold, fear of animals, phone smashing to avoid call tracing.... all while high on pot.  They go to Red's house who's been visited by the nutty hit men.  An outrageous fight IN the house leaves the bathroom in a shambles and Red with 2 gunshots to the abdomen.  Never fear.... he lives to the end of the movie.  Meanwhile, the Chinese decide it's the right time to attack Ted's mob in an underground bunker used by the military for experiments with marijuana in the 50's.  

Probably the last 30 minutes of this 1 hour, 50 minute movie is the funniest when all the players end up at the bunker trying to take each other out.  I will tell you, if you like the 'Beavis and Butt-Head" type of comedy, you're sure to love this movie.  However, the language and violence are purely for the big screen. 

The story took 3 minds to formulate:  Seth Rogen, his co-writer on "Superbad", Evan Goldberg, and amazing writer/director, Judd Apatow ("Don't Mess With Zohan"/'Fun With Dick and Jane"/"Knocked Up"/"Walk Hard" among a few).  Rogen and Goldberg wrote the screenplay.  Writer/director David Gordon Green (none of whose works I recognized) directed this dizzy comedy.  It's definitely rated "R" and not for kids.  My opinion is wait for the DVD but lots of people need a mindless 2 hours at the theater. 

The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants 2:  My rating:  $7.75 (1.-10.).

Amber Tamblyn (Tibby), America Ferrera (Carmen), Blake Lively (Bridget), and Alexis Bledel (Lena) return as the 4 childhood friends off on individual, growing-up experiences during summer break from college.  They still have those magical pants that fits sizes 4 to 12.  Now, they pass the pants around weekly via mail.  The pants tenuously holds the storyline together for the sake of the movie's title but have little to do with the girls' adventures this time around. 

Lena broke up with Greek fiance, Kostas (played by non-Greek, Michael Rady) but has second thoughts at a relative's wedding.... until he introduces his wife.  Bledel does a great 'brave face in an uncomfortable situation' scene.  She goes off to take an art workshop on drawing the human form where she meets their gorgeous model, Leo (stunningly blue-eyed Jesse Williams). 

Carmen, low self-esteem in tow, is the back stage manager for the college production company where most of the kids have parental ties to the stage or screen.  She's the perfect friend for blonde narcissist, Julia (Rachel Nichols - the girl stuck in the parking garage in 'P2').  After learning her best friends all opted for alternate experiences for the summer rather than spending time with each other, Carmen takes Julia up on doing summer stock where students get to act with real stage stars (none that we would know, mind you).   I digress:  Anyone see "300" with all those delectable Spartans?  Then you'll know who I mean when I say 'Atinos' or 'the Captain's son'.  Well, that was Tom Wisdom, 35 year-old Brit who plays the hot, hot, hot early-20's leading man, Ian, in the summer play.  You gotta guess that he gets the hots for down-to-earth Carmen.  Nothing like a man to help raise self-esteem.

Tibby is even more screwed up than usual.  She's in film school and hasn't been able to complete her assignment to write and produce a 'romantic comedy'.  She wears wigs, makeup, and outrageous clothes depending on her ever-changing moods.  Her boyfriend, Brian McBrian, is played by Leonardo Nam (Argentinean-born of Korean parents with a degree in Architecture from Sydney University in Australia.  Best known to me as the tough Japanese guy in "Fast and Furious Tokyo Drift".)  He gives a wonderfully sensitive performance without looking stupid.  In a moment of passion, they unite and the condom breaks.  Hence, Tibby's crushing introduction to reality.

Lastly, there's soccer star, Bridget, whose mother committed suicide laying the groundwork for years of emotional estrangement from her father who enabled his wife's mental illness over the years out of love.  She finds a box of letters of her maternal Grandmother (Blythe Danner) hidden in the garage.  Grandma recognized her daughter's illness and advocated for psychological placement.  All it got her was cut off from her daughter, her son-in-law, and her grandchild.  Following her adventurous nature, Bridget goes to Turkey to work on an archeological dig.  While there, she meets the wise and beautiful Yia Yia (Maria Konstadarou), a middle eastern archeologist who has survived much turmoil in her war torn country.  She makes Bridget stop and recognize that the world doesn't just revolve around her.  Cutting short her Turkish adventure, she goes to reconnect with Grandmom and learn some grown-up lessons.

The pace of the movie, to me, starts like a slow Greek dance.  You know, that one with the scarves where lines of guys hold each other's waist and go in circles.  Slowly at first, then full of energy.  We become reacquainted with the girls and their current status in life.  They each have challenges to their belief systems, attitudes about friendship and love, as well as learn to look at themselves more realistically.  As troubles brew and each reaches a crisis, the scenes switch more and more rapidly from girl to girl until all reach their intended moment of truth.  But it doesn't end there.  The girls must ultimately come back together and use their new awarenesses to aid each other to their final resolution.   

Lucy Hale ("Wizards of Waverly Place") plays Lena's little sister, Effie, who has always resented not being allowed in the clique.  She gets to try and steal Tibby's boyfriend.  She also gets to steal the pants and lose them.  This girl has a future.  She's gorgeous, can act well enough, and is only 19. 

"Traveling Pants 2" was adapted from the Ann Brashares novel by Elizabeth Chandler ("What A Girl Wants").  Sanaa Hamri (directed "The Adventures of Mimi" with Mariah Carey) directed.  It's rated "PG-13" (which would have been 'R' in the 80's by the way) and runs about 2 hours with a couple of trailers.  There's plenty of girly action and young love to go around.  It's a chick flick -- no doubt.  But you might get your guy there to look at one or more of these cute female stars.   

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