Kerry DoughertySeems like only yesterday that my brother was up in arms about his son's low-riding pants.
"Put a belt on," he'd order when my nephew walked into the room, yanking on his baggy jeans. "If those things get any lower, they'll be socks."
It was a futile fight, as most generational battles are.
Fast forward six years.
This same kid graduated from college last spring and landed a great job. When I saw my nephew in August, he was rocking a tuxedo at his brother's wedding, looking like he'd stepped out of GQ.
So much for droopy drawers. They were a phase. As they are with most guys.
Fact is, you don't see many 35-year-olds with inseams around their knees. Employed 35-year-olds, that is. After a certain age, saggy pants cease being a fashion statement and become loser wear.
We all should take a deep breath and remember that, as the long arm of government begins reaching for teenagers' waistbands.
Three years after local Del. Algie "Captain Underpants" Howell made Virginia the butt of jokes with his unsuccessful attempt to enact a state dress code - it would have banned anyone from baring "below-the-waist undergarments" - this idea has caught on in other places.
According to a front-page story last week, localities from Louisiana to Michigan have banned low-riders and 10 more are about to. Punishments for droopy drawers range from warnings to jail.
Turning fashion offenses into criminal acts is a dangerous precedent. Remember, it won't be long before the saggy pants crowd is writing the laws.
Think of the things they'll be tempted to ban: comb-overs, unibrows and socks with sandals. You know what they say about paybacks.
From a functional point of view, low-riders are ludicrous. They prevent the wearer from moving fast. But then again, so do stilettos.
Unlike stilettos, droopy drawers never hurt anyone.
Seems to me, if bare derrieres are on display, the exhibitionists can be cited under indecent exposure ordinances. But if it's boxers or briefs hanging out, there's a simple solution, avert your eyes.
If women can jog in sweaty athletic bras, men should have the right to sashay around with undies showing.
When I first wrote about this underwear inanity in the winter of 2006, I asked a focus group of teenagers - in my living room - what they'd like to ban. Their list was surprisingly long and included bow ties, toupees, mom jeans, granny panties and Christmas sweaters.
We all find certain trends laughable. Remember leg warmers? Ponchos? Platform shoes? No one seriously suggested outlawing those fashion faux pas. So why pick on the saggy pants posse? They'll eventually grow up.
If only lawmakers would.
Kerry Dougherty, (757) 446-2306, kerry.dougherty@cox.net
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Wowwwww!
All of you people cant be serious????? How pathetically anal rententive can you all be? The whole point was that it shouldnt be against the law. I personally dont like to see another mans undergarments out in public but sheesh! Get over it! Thats why us americans have these little politically twisted things called RIGHTS! So what if someone doesnt want a good shot at a job, or wants to be unappealing to the rest of you prudes. He/she has the right to do so... Its about not letting the gov't make those kind of unconstitutional decisions. I know its a petty thing but so was certain types of art at one point in time. Let us be American..... Please.
OMFG
Are you seriously comparing looking at someones leg warmers, Ponchos, Platform shoes, To looking at someones butt crack through skin thin boxers?
Holy Moly you really aren't to bright are you !!!
It's the style in this place.
This "style" started in the jail/prison system. The convicts would lower the top half of their jumpsuit and use the tied sleeves as a belt. Then they would pull the waistband of their underwear up, I guess so you know they were wearing some. And if they were really cool they would streach underwear over their head as a "watchcap" type of headgear. That's probably going to be the next big thing in the fashion statement of the kiddies. But mom and dad if you don't care what your little future convict looks like then why should I care. At least you will know where they are when you want to visit them.
Howell was right
and I was sorry, it didn't follow through and become law. People got scared, but VA is always so insecure and never wants to lead the way in doing anything. If anything, VA will be the last to act.
In an earlier comment I forgot to mention the guys who wear their pants under their butt, and just as low in the front. Where will it end?
Kerry, I'm sorry, but I can picture a focus group of teens in your living romm, coming from upper class citizens, who are so protected they don't have a real clue of what's going on in this world.
Howell was right, YOU on the other hand are dead wrong!
personal entertainment?
Yep. I saw a guy running across the street, leaning backwards and holding his britches up at the time. Very funny! He was Mr. Cool Dude.
all you have to do is come to campus
here at ODU and see a ton of guys wearing the low pants. We had a job fair and there were a bunch of them trying to get a job, but would you hire any one who had to spend more time pulling up their pants over doing a job... needless to say, I dont' think very many were hired.
There is no Accounting for Tast
The way I see it is that All People were put on this Earth for my own Personal Entertainment. In addition; one of my co-workers made a nice Arrest when the Dude he was Chasing had his loose droopy britches fall down, causing him to do the same.
in your face butt????
"We all find certain trends laughable. Remember leg warmers? Ponchos? Platform shoes? No one seriously suggested outlawing those fashion faux pas. So why pick on the saggy pants posse? They'll eventually grow up."
There is noting laughable about an in your face butt. If you are at the beach that's one thing, but sorry not while I'm running errands like the grocery store. And it isn't just the butt. Some of these guys where their pants down just as low in the front as they do in the back. Laughable? Hardly!
poor taste
I do not like to see them droopy drawers and those colorful undies! Wear them, if you must, inside your own home. Pretty soon you'll just see those undies on the street, then later maybe not even those. Call it what you want, I call it very, very poor taste and poor parenting!
Hey!
Guess I can only wear my legwarmers in the privacy of my own home now! Ha ha, thanks for a funny column. Cheers, MGM
Inseams around the knees...
Kerry,
Great commentary. a few months back I was converting negatives into digital and could only laugh looking at some of the old styles - leisure suits for one.
Everyday I go to work with my inseams at my knees, at my ankles and many places up and down the inside of my leg. I never go around though in a suit that has the pants crotch at my knees....