Kerry DoughertyFrom time to time a reader will complain that they're fed up with all the negativity in the newspaper. (Never mind that by griping, they add to the general negativity quotient.) Why don't papers - or columnists, at least - give us something to smile about, they ask?
Take Juanita. She thought my Sunday column, the one that predicted that the Obama daughters' future puppy would inevitably morph into a blind and smelly old dog that the parents would be stuck with for many years, focused only on the downside of pet ownership.
"Couldn't it be that this dog Obama will be taking care of after his children are away at college (will) be a sweet reminder of when his children still lived at home?" she asked in an e-mail, noting that I was not being very optimistic. "... the way things are in the economy lately, we want to see and hear about glasses being half full."
Juanita has a point. So, this is for her.
As a matter of fact, it is hard to escape bad news. Everywhere we turn we hear about bankruptcies, foreclosures and unemployment. It's depressing. And if it's not big financial stories, it's little depressing ones: people trying to pinch pennies by giving up their lattes or soap or by going longer between haircuts.
It's enough to make you wonder whether any good can come out of hard times.
Of course it can.
You just have to look for it. And that's what we're going to do.
For instance, here's some good news: House prices are coming down. I suppose it's also bad news if you're a Realtor, have a house for sale or are saddled with a jumbo mortgage. But the glass if definitely half full if you're shopping for your first home, so cheers!
Besides, with money being tight, we can only assume that trades people - I'm thinking mainly contractors - will have less work. That's not good for them, but it could mean they'll be more inclined to arrive when they say they will and stay till the job's done. No more telling desperate homeowners that they'll be back to close that hole in the roof "around the first of the week." (These guys are the only ones who ever use the term "first of the week," incidentally. After nearly 20 years of living in a needy fixer-up house, I've learned that the first of the week is any day but Friday.)
There could be other, hidden benefits for consumers in a bad economy.
Remember how hard it was to get the attention of a sales clerk when stores were packed last December? That shouldn't be a problem this year. Retailers are glumly predicting the slowest Christmas season ever, so it shouldn't be hard to find some assistance. If the staff works on commission, shoppers may be surrounded by helpful clerks.
Beyond that, chances are, whatever you're looking for will be in stock. It might even be on sale.
Here's something else that's about to get a lot easier: dinner reservations in a popular restaurant on a Saturday night. You could have the place to yourself. The chef may even come out and join you.
If the hard times spread all the way to Hollywood - and judging from the dough the new James Bond movie raked in last weekend, there's no reason to think they will - actors may put off cosmetic surgery. That means the movie going public might get to see what a 70-year-old person really looks like on film. That would be astonishing.
Finally, about that presidential puppy. In the interest of optimism, I should point out that before the lovable little nipper turns into an arthritic, flatulent canine, the f irst f amily will have many happy years filled with house training, chewed shoes and ruined rugs.
Sorry, Juanita, sometimes I can't help myself.
Kerry Dougherty, (757) 446-2306, kerry.dougherty@cox.net
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To msanders1409
I wonder the same thing every time I read Kerry's articles with the accompanying comments. It's kind of odd too, that some of the articles that I think are the most humorous and tongue-in-cheek are the same ones that other people take the most offense at and are negative about.
Hmmm...
I wonder why people who obviously have a disdain for Kerry's articles continue to read them???
"if you're willing to look for it"
Just don't expect to find it in any of Kerry's articles.
“If it bleeds, it leads.”
Dr. Koch's 2008 State of the Region Report: Crime constituted the lead story in 45+% of all local TV evening newscasts. "How this news is reported influences our understanding, affects our emotions and contributes to our feelings of anger, fear and distrust, as well as our sense of joy, peace and safety. In short, local television news broadcasts frame how we view the world, how we behave toward one another, and ultimately the choices we make in living out our lives here in Hampton Roads." Dr. Koch asks "Are our local television stations actually telling viewers what’s really going on, and what they really need to worry about, or are they instead distorting the images we have of each other and our region, and thereby poisoning the well?" And, these "stories would fail to impress tourists who happened to be watching, or prospective firms that might be thinking about locating in the region.“ :-(
A puppy in the white house will help support the print media
Kerry's folded face might someday protect the white house carpets.
Bitter Apple
Doesn't work for all dogs. Mine just thinks it's a nice marinade and keeps chewing. He's started on his second dog house, and I have to keep him away from the cedar shingles on our house.
Ceasar
Introduce them to the Dog Whisperer
Stop puppies from chewing Shoes, furniture..etc
Grannick's Bitter Apple®. It works best if you use it immeadiatly when you get the puppy. After the pup tries to chew it the first time if it has bitter apple on it, they will have no desire to chew it again.