Clouseau Deja Vu in 'Pink Panther 2'

So-o-o-o-o silly!

Still, you have to admit, Inspector Clouseau is enough to make any member of any audience feel superior. Maybe even secure.

“The Pink Panther 2” is probably one of the least eagerly awaited sequels around. “Deux,” as the French would say, is a continuation of the Martin vehicle of 2006 that grossed almost $160 million worldwide, in spite of dismal reviews. It is little more than a group of sight gags strung together to fill 90 minutes.

Peter Sellers originated the role in 1964, and the bumbling, bewildered French inspector has become a part of pop culture. The same people who like The Three Stooges comedies like him. The rest of humankind can’t stand the whole thing.

You might like a hint, though, about some of the routines.

Clouseau, reduced to writing parking tickets in Paris, gives a ticket to an irate motorist who decides to ignore the fool and drive away. Clouseau gets his arm stuck in the  window and has to run beside the fleeing car.

Upon meeting the pope (whose ring has been stolen), Clouseau tries on one of the papal robes and falls off the Vatican balcony when he can’t resist an urge to bless the throng below.

After tilting over a wine rack, he frantically tries to save the falling bottles by shuffling them off to frantic nearby waiters. The result is the movie’s best-staged bit – a massive juggling act involving wine bottles. 

All this is sandwiched into the flimsiest of  plots. It seems a mastermind thief called The Tornado has stolen such valuable relics as the Shroud of Turin, the Magna Carta, the imperial Japanese sword and the pope’s ring. The fabled Pink Panther jewel (featured in almost all the “Panther” movies) may be next. A “dream team” of international detectives  is assembled to apprehend the culprit.

To the dismay of Inspector Dreyfus (played by John Cleese, who replaces Kevin Kline from the last movie), Clouseau is the natural choice to represent France. The others include Andy Garcia and Alfred Molina, as well as representatives from Japan and India.

Because almost everything Clouseau says is politically incorrect, Lily Tomlin is brought in as an etiquette expert  for him. It is a reunion of Martin with his “All of Me” co-star. Tomlin is adept at reacting with droll disgust at the dullard’s every move. It’s funny, but the routine runs on too long as, in fact, does just about every gag.

I regard Martin as a far greater comic than Sellers ever was. Martin should have received Academy Award nominations for both “All of Me” (in which he played a man trapped in a woman’s body, or vice versa) and “Roxanne” (in which he played the big-nosed Cyrano who doesn’t get the girl).

But it probably would have been better if Martin hadn’t done “Pink Panther,” because he doesn’t do the French accent as well as Sellers. Also, he’s better at delivering lines than the visual gags on which  this franchise depends.

Emily Mortimer returns as the assistant who is Clouseau’s love interest. Jean Reno returns as the frustrated sidekick Ponton, but he’s given nothing to do.

Dutch director Harald Zwart lacks the hint of phony sophistication that Blake Edwards brought to the originals. What can you expect from a director whose main credit is “Agent Cody Banks” (2003)?

Even so, this is funnier than the first Martin version. There is a noticeable effort here to appeal more to children. Mischievous sexual hints are out

Kids besting Clouseau at karate are in.

It’s pretty dumb, but isn’t that what it’s supposed to be? In these times, we need a laugh from anywhere we can get it.

Mal Vincent, (757) 446-2347, mal.vincent@pilotonline.com