Hispanic churches combat attitudes of 'machismo'

As the new pastor at Vino Nuevo in Virginia Beach, the Rev. Gladys Mejias-Ashmore has been teaching a lot about family, parenting - and the dangers of machismo.

In Latin culture, the macho man looms large as boss of wife and family. But more than a few local Hispanic evangelical pastors are teaching that machismo violates Christian norms for husbands and fathers.

It's a message Mejias-Ashmore said she never heard in church growing up in Honduras. "I used to think the Christian let the man do whatever he wants - even extramarital relationships."

But after being "born again" and studying Bible passages on marriage, Mejias-Ashmore said she challenged her first husband about his drinking and adultery.

"He drank so much and would come home violent; he once hit me and knocked me out." As a Christian, she forgave him. As a woman, she finally sought safety by divorce.

"It doesn't have to be that way," she said of machismo. "Jesus came to restore dignity to woman."

There are about 35 evangelical Protestant Hispanic congregations in Hampton Roads, according to the Rev. Juan D. Gonzales of the Tidewater Hispanic Evangelical Ministers Association. Several Catholic parishes also have significant Hispanic memberships.

The U.S. Census estimates that as recently as 2007 there were about 45,000 Latinos in South Hampton Roads, up from 33,318 in 2000. Their places of ancestry include Cuba, Puerto Rico and Mexico.

Cocky, masculine, tough, sexist and self-important are traits often conjured up by "macho," as in, "Es muy macho" - "He's a real man."

Although domineering men can be found anywhere, macho behavior generally looms larger within Hispanic culture, said Jose Gonzalez, a Spanish-language blogger for the Christian Broadcasting Network.

Gonzalez, who grew up in Uruguay, runs Semilla Inc., which provides leadership training in Latin America from a biblical perspective. He has taught at Regent University, an evangelical school in Virginia Beach.

"Too many Hispanics measure our manhood by how we dominate our women, socially, emotionally or sexually. This inequality destroys happiness, reducing many women to a secondary role," he wrote in a recent posting.

Machistas, or male chauvinists, expect their wives and family females to be chaste, but "the man is free to do whatever - have affairs, have another woman," said Gonzales from the Hispanic ministers association.

The macho man often dominates the whole family, as Jesus Rodriguez of Virginia Beach recalled from his Mexican boyhood.

At gatherings at his grandfather's house, "everyone had to line up at the door and wait for him to come and, one by one, kiss his right hand and his left cheek. I never saw anything wrong with that," Rodriguez said.

Machismo's staying power is fueled partly by Latin American religious perspectives, including Marianismo, the cult of the Virgin Mary.

"The Virgin Mary is the image or symbol for resignation, for acceptance of your lot, and the victim," said Mavel Velasco, a Latin American literature scholar at Virginia Wesleyan College. Velasco, who is from Bolivia, said Mary also can be a symbol of strength for women during crisis.

Latin men, meanwhile, sometimes excuse their macho behavior by citing the apostle Paul, who wrote that among Christians, the man should be the head of the wife.

That interpretation ignores Paul's further advice that Christian men should love their wives just as Jesus Christ loved and served the church, Gonzales said.

The Rev. Italo Gil of Nueva Vida Christian Church in Virginia Beach tells his Latin congregants to trade machismo for "servant leadership" in which spouses treat each other as partners.

Machismo is rarely addressed from the pulpit at Spanish Masses at St. Gregory the Great Catholic Church in Virginia Beach, said Janice Sigala, the church's Hispanic outreach director.

But Catholic clergy speak against domestic violence and for women's God-given human rights, said Sigala, who grew up in Puerto Rico.

Whether they go to church or not, Latin men may find their machismo challenged by American openness to working women and gender rights.

Ricardo Martinez, an auto body repair technician living in Virginia Beach, said he took machismo for granted before moving from El Salvador to the United States as a teen.

But in Bible study and classes led by Gonzales, Martinez realized he was being macho when, for example, he refused to let his wife work outside their home.

"The Bible says the man should love woman the way he loves himself," said Martinez, who attends Iglesia Bautista del Camino in Norfolk.

Now, he's glad his wife has a job that helps support their family.

"I'm more Americanized and in this culture," he said. "I need to help her, looking after the kids, picking up the laundry. I've got a different view."

Steven G. Vegh, (757) 446-2417, steven.vegh@pilotonline.com