Paralyzed by bullet, man wishes to be home for Christmas

Last December, two gunshots changed Mark Baker’s life forever.

He was chatting with a friend on her front porch in Norfolk when a man approached them and pulled out a gun. They tussled, and the man fired twice.

The first bullet tore through his shoulder and lung. The second severed his spinal cord, paralyzing him below the shoulders.

Mark spent Christmas in the hospital. He barely remembers what happened.

During the past 12 months, he’s made the arduous journey from the hospital to a rehabilitation center in Richmond to a nursing home on Bonney Road in Virginia Beach, where he’s lived since late March.

This year, he asked for one Christmas gift: To go home.

His wish came true Saturday, when he moved into his brother’s house in Norfolk. Getting him there has taken thousands of dollars, months of hard work, hours of phone calls and mountains of paperwork.

People are shot almost every day in Hampton Roads. Some emerge relatively unscathed. Some die. Many, like Mark, are never the same.

Before the evening of Dec. 3, 2008, Mark Baker was an active 39-year-old who spent his time bodybuilding and working for his family’s concrete business.

When he woke up in Sentara Norfolk General Hospital, unable to walk, move his arms or breathe on his own, he had to rethink everything.

At first, doctors didn’t expect him to live, said Mark’s brother, Buddy Baker. Doctors asked his family if they wanted to remove him from life support. They left the decision up to Mark.

“He just kept saying, 'I want to live,’” Buddy said.

Eventually Mark regained the ability to breathe on his own. After two months in the hospital, he was transferred to a rehabilitation center at the Medical College of Virginia in Richmond.

Mark was grappling with depression, Buddy said. He felt defenseless and was afraid to be alone. The Richmond center helped him work through that.

There, doctors, therapists and social workers taught Mark how to live as a quadriplegic. Over several months, they provided speech therapy, physical training, counseling – and hope.

“In our eyes, MCV saved Mark’s life,” said his sister, Kim Baker.

“When we rolled him in there, Mark was a miserable sight,” Buddy said. “When we rolled him out of there, he was smiling. They told him, 'Hey, you’ve got a whole life to go.’”

But the time Kim and Buddy spent in Richmond took a toll on the family business, Buddy Baker Concrete. “We almost went out of business,” Kim said. “It was tough.”

At the end of March, Mark moved into the River Pointe Rehabilitation and Healthcare Center in Virginia Beach, where he faced a whole new set of challenges.

Now 40, he was one of the youngest people in the nursing home. In nine months, he’s had four roommates. The first three died.

“It’s a nice place to live,” he said. “I just feel kind of out of place because I’m younger than a lot of the people here.”

He spent almost every day in bed, waiting for the weekends when friends or family could pick him up for lunch, church, a movie or a ball game.

The highlight of his spring was seeing Willie Nelson with Bob Dylan and John Mellencamp in concert at Harbor Park, he said.

“Stuff like that, it may seem so basic,” he said. “But for my life, it’s a big event.”

His family began working on moving him home earlier this year.

Buddy found a wheelchair-accessible van on Craigslist for $2,000. His aunt Pearl Crichton found a bed that will prevent bed sores, which can cause infection. They all pitched in to host a fundraiser in August, raising nearly $19,000.

They also got some help. The Endependence Center, a Norfolk nonprofit that helps with disability services, steered them to the Money Follows the Person program. The state and federal initiative provides funding to help disabled people transition from long-term-care facilities into private homes.

“It’s been a hell of a few months,” Kim said.

But Mark’s family – four brothers, one sister and several nieces and nephews – have adjusted to their new roles in his life. They said they don’t resent the extra responsibility.

During lunch at Mi Casita on Bonney Road last month, Buddy and Kim took turns feeding Mark chips, fajitas and water. Helping care for him has just become part of their everyday lives, they said.

“It pulled our family closer,” Kim said.

Mark still struggles with the small things, such as not being able to brush his own teeth, and the big things, such as missing work and fishing.

“It’s kind of like being born all over again,” he said.

But being home helps.

“It feels good,” he said. “It helps your mind-set because the last thing I want to do is get depressed.”

Mark’s journey is not over. A crew will soon install equipment to help him be more self-sufficient – a ramp outside Buddy’s home, a lift to move him from his bed to his wheelchair, and a voice-activated system to control the TV and lights.

His family also has ordered a new wheelchair, one that Mark can control with his head so no one will need to push him.

“The more that I can do for myself, the better I feel,” he said. “I just try to be as normal as I can, you know, even though I’m hurt.”

Medicaid and Mark’s disability checks have helped pay for everything, Kim said. But there are still lots of bills.

Mark’s van broke down last weekend and needs several thousand dollars worth of electrical work, Kim said. And the heating and air conditioning needs repair, which is vital because Mark can’t control his body temperature.

A new van, outfitted to handle Mark’s wheelchair, would cost between $30,000 and $50,000, Buddy said. They’re also paying off Mark’s bed. It cost about $25,000 used, and they still owe $12,000.

Mark’s aunt, Pearl Crichton, is working to get help from a fund for crime victims. They’re also planning another fundraiser . This time, they’ll donate half the proceeds to the Medical College of Virginia as a thank-you gift, Kim said.

Once everything’s in order for Mark’s daily needs, Kim’s next mission is to help him build a new life. She’s looking for a voice-controlled laptop so Mark can enroll in college classes online. She’s also taken him to a gym, where he hopes to work by verbally coaching people on how to use the workout equipment.

“I’m still real young,” Mark said. “I’d like to continue to do something. I’m trying to narrow it down to what I will be able to do.

“Most of my work was physical, and now I have to switch to mental.”

The person who shot Mark that Wednesday evening has never been caught. Police said the man had robbed several people in the Coleman Place neighborhood where the shooting occurred.

Mark is glad he doesn’t remember much.

“At least I don’t have trauma and nightmares,” he said.

Still, he worries that his shooter could destroy another life.

“That’s what bothers me the most,” he said. “I’d hate to see somebody else go through what I’ve gone through, or worse.”

It’s unbelievable how far Mark has come in a year, Kim said. The family is holding out hope that stem-cell research may find a cure for him one day. Until then, they’re just glad to have him home.

“He has been amazingly brave through this whole thing,” Pearl Crichton said. “He believes there is a purpose that he’s here and he wasn’t taken away from us last December.”

When the family gathers for Christmas dinner this evening, Mark will have a seat at the table.

It’s “a real blessing,” he said. “Just getting me home is a big enough Christmas present for me.” Kathy Adams, (757) 222-5155, kathy.adams@pilotonline.com