Pay no attention to the motivation for this seminar

Everyone in the audience was this close to succeeding.

Everyone was this close to making money. No, scratch that. Big money.

Tuesday was the first day of school, the perfect time for adults to learn from the world’s most important people – who flew via helicopter – right here to Norfolk, Virginia.

And so, as part of the heavily advertised “Get Motivated” seminar, 7,000 of the area’s most professionally ambitious came to the Ted Constant Convocation Center to listen to Laura Bush and Terry Bradshaw and Lou Holtz and some business executives most people had never heard of, all for the affordable price of $225.

Or maybe they paid $1.95, which means that the organizers were practically giving away their product. But do not concentrate on that detail; do not concentrate on what kind of operation says something costs $225 but gives it away for $1.95. Do not wonder if an organization like that might have ulterior motives. Concentrate on getting motivated.

Hey, who wants a free iPad? Who wants a 42-inch TV?

Dance. Do the Thriller dance. Network. Talk to the person next to you, exchange business cards.

Get motivated.

Because the only thing separating those in the crowd and those in the middle class from making $100,000 or more a year is … motivation.

It’s not corporations keeping higher salaries for executives while worker pay is stagnant. It’s not sloppy legislation or a digital revolution. Do not talk about that.

Who wants a Disney vacation?

“Even by being here today, you are getting stronger, better, bigger,” Keith Craft, a Dallas preacher and the event’s emcee, told his audience.

Look at the speakers. They’re simple people from simple backgrounds. There is Lou Holtz, who claimed to have read only two books in his life. And Terry Bradshaw, with his measly physical education degree from Louisiana Tech. What separates them from the crowd?

Is it motivation?

Ninety-nine percent of our DNA is the same, Craft repeated throughout the day. Pay no mind that humans share 98 percent of their DNA with chimpanzees. This is the religion of success, of the most materialistic version of the American dream, and Tuesday the Ted was the megachurch.

But before everyone in the crowd could move on to their glitz and riches, before they could become household names themselves, they needed to take a few minutes to consider “the spiritual side of success.” Ponder God’s role in their lives. That doesn’t mean pray quietly in your seats. You have to accept God into your heart, and there were people on-site to help.

Also, one more thing, since you want to make money – and who doesn’t want to make money? – sign up for a special class that will teach you how to “outperform the stock market” and beat the big boys. The class is worth $2,200, but the organizers of “Get Motivated” were offering it for $99.

Again, do not think about what kind of operation says something costs $2,200 but charges $99. Do not think about what kind of organization preys on our natural desire to want more, especially at a time when everyone is working harder but so few see the fruits of their labor, when wages have not increased, when home values have dropped and when investments have shrunk. Do not think about what kind of people would try to convince you that a $99 seminar will transform your life.

Focus instead on the most pornographic version of the American dream, this false notion that success requires only hard work and steely determination and broad dreams and unwavering faith and cheeriness. Remember one-liners like “If you chase two rabbits, you’ll never catch either one” that fit neatly on bulletin boards.

Get motivated.

Get this close to success.

But never any closer.

Mike Gruss, (757) 446-2277, mike.gruss@pilotonline.com