The Virginian-Pilot
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Nicole Walker moved to Virginia Beach and in with her parents last year because the stress of handling four young boys after her ex-husband had died had become too much. She also wanted to return to school but didn't know how to make that happen.
Earlier this year, Walker learned of the Still Hope Foundation, which offers single moms classes in leadership and empowerment, and partners them with women who become mentors.
"I've learned that I'm not the only person going through this," Walker, 28, said. "Some are going through something worse, but I'm not alone."
Still Hope was started in 2008 by Tony and Monica Brothers of Smithfield to give educational and personal support to moms who were going it alone.
This weekend, the foundation is hosting a celebrity gala and golf weekend, with a long list of professional football and basketball players scheduled to attend. Proceeds will go to the Still Hope program, which is run through the YWCA in Norfolk.
Tony Brothers, a referee for the NBA, handles the fundraising. His wife, Monica, who has worked with Tidewater Community College's Women's Center and the YWCA, prefers working with the mothers and their children.
Tony Brothers got the idea for a support network a few years back when he noticed that young people getting into trouble too often came from single-parent households, he said.
But he knew that these children weren't doomed to fail simply because they had only one parent at home. His mom had raised him and his sister in a stable, middle-class environment, he said.
His mother, Dorothy, had started a scholarship when she was the national director for the Bank of America Supplier Diversity and Development Group. She provided financial help and mentors to minority- and women-owned businesses. Dorothy Brothers died in 2002, and her son saw Still Hope as a way to carry on her legacy.
The foundation not only connects women with available services but also pairs them with a volunteer coach through a program called "Journey for Success." The coaches serve as cheerleaders and sounding boards, and they attend many of the empowerment classes along with the moms.
Walker said her coach calls her daily and is always in her ear with an uplifting scripture and a reminder of the progress Walker has made, such as getting a job and a car and joining Toastmasters International to overcome a fear of public speaking.
Walker finally can picture herself going back to school and becoming the judge she's always wanted to be.
"My boys will say sometimes, 'Mom, you're just happy nowadays,' " she said. "They are seeing a difference. And with me being happy, they are happy."
Denise Watson Batts, (757) 446-2504, denise.batts@pilotonline.com
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Thanks to Virginian-Pilot for modifying article
I would like to thank the Virginian-Pilot for modifying this article to include the reason Nicole is a single mother. Her ex-husband passed away! We should never pass judgement on any individual. The reason for Still Hope is to help those that find themselves in this situation regardless of how they became a single mother. Nicole is one of the superstars of the Journey for Success program and is helping others see there is "Still Hope". Those that would pass judgement or take shots at others should examine themselves and use that energy to make a difference. I feel qualified to make that statement because I'm doing just that!
Tony Brothers
Co-founder - Still Hope Foundation, Inc.
Unfortunately
There will always be those who automatically assume that just because there isn't a husband visible, that the mother must be (a) irresponsible, (b) immature, (c) immoral, or (d) ignorant. How many single mothers are there now, who are widows of the Mideast wars? How many women are the victims of assault, or rape, and, as a result of the self-righteous inanity of the far right unable to get either prevention information or abortions? And finally, who gave ANYONE the right to judge others on the basis of their own prejudices?! This is a worthwhile program. There should be more like it.
Try this
Dont have babies until you can afford them. And having 4? At 28 with no support?
Really?
Please don't judge
I was a single mother at age 31 years old with three children ages 4 and under. Why? Because my husband passed away. I am sure many people looked at me and thought the same thought you have. It was hard raising three small children alone but I went to school, finished a degree and we are doing very well 15 years later. I applaud the efforts this organization is doing. Getting these women on their feet, no matter the circumstance that put them there, will only help them and our society as a whole.
who can afford kids?
If our parents waited until they could afford us, very few of us would be here. Money would be the greatest form of natural selection!