It's a sad cycle at newspapers: tying, untying ties that bind

Sorry to begin the new year on a bleak note, but I need a favor: I want everyone to be patient with me for the next few weeks. Chances are I'll be off-kilter.

I'm getting a divorce, you see. My fifth. In 11 years. Splits like these can take a toll on a person, believe me.

Wait. It's not that kind of a divorce. In fact, I'm in the throes of a breakup with a man who spends more time with me than my spouse does.

My editor.

I'm not proud of this, but I go through editors like the Kardashians go through lip plumper.

First there was Bill. Then Fred. Next was Nelson. After that was a brief dalliance with Carl. Finally, another Bill.

Next up: Matt. Poor guy.

Lots of companies reorganize from time to time. Newspapers do it constantly. Just when everyone in the newsroom has comfortably settled into a routine, someone decides to shake things up by reassigning writers to new editors. They always say it's time to "do more with less" or "streamline the operation" or "work smarter, not harder."

When I began this gig in 2000, I was part of a news team, with a news editor. A couple of years later, I was reassigned to the writing coach's team. Next thing I knew, someone thought I should work with a witty former sports editor who was known as a wizard with a pencil. After that, I was assigned to an editor who worked only with experienced writers. A couple of years ago, I was tossed to a senior editor.

"Bill's a good writer and easy to work with," they said. "You'll love him."

And I did. Until last month's announcement that our relationship was being terminated.

Seems I need to be on a news team. Again. The one that drew the short straw this time is in Virginia Beach. So watch out, City Hall, I now have a desk in Town Center. What are you smiling about, Mayor Fraim? I can still get to Norfolk in under 11 minutes.

Without light rail.

Getting used to a new editor won't be quite as easy. It's like adjusting to any new boss. At first, there's trepidation, sometimes fear. Not on my part, on the editor's.

No doubt the new guy has heard about me. The way I treat deadlines as suggestions. Those annoying attacks of writer's remorse that strike after I turn in a column. My capricious use of commas.

Still, as I enter my sixth arranged marriage, I have faith that it will work on some level. Until management pulls the plug on us.

If history is any predictor, my new boss will be smart, patient and guileless. If he thinks my opinions are idiotic, he'll keep it to himself. If he thinks I've lost my mind on a topic, he'll roll his eyes and be grateful that it isn't his byline or mug shot in the paper.

Don't tell anyone, but I get attached to my editors, and breaking in a new one can be hard work. Distracting, too.

Since divorce and remarriage is always hardest on the kids - you don't mind if I think of you as family, do you?- I'm apologizing in advance and asking for a little New Year's patience.

So, goodbye, Bill II. It was good while it lasted. Hello, Matt.

Happy New Year, everyone.

Kerry Dougherty, (757) 446-2306, kerry.dougherty@cox.net, PilotOnline.com/dougherty