Right way, wrong way, and Only-In-Virginia way

Whoa. How did we miss this one? Looks like there's one bill everyone can support working its way through the General Assembly.

Everyone except teetotalers, that is. And beer distributors.

I'm talking about SB604, which quietly sailed through the Senate and is now in the House of Delegates. Essentially, it would allow breweries to sell the stuff they make on the premises.

Think about it. Virginia's breweries not only make beer but many also offer tours. Yet, the owners are not normally permitted to sell visitors a six-pack on the way out the door. For that, you usually have to go to a grocery or convenience store, where the beer has been delivered by a middleman. Your friendly neighborhood beer distributor.

When I called the St. George Brewing Co. in Hampton on Friday, I talked to William Spence Jr., a strong supporter of the buy-beer-at-the-brewery bill. He said the real issue is parity.

"We just want breweries, wineries and distilleries to all be treated the same," Spence told me. "Wineries can sell their product; we want to sell ours."

By the way, Spence has a dream job: director of drinking operations.

What a coincidence. I held that title for a while in college. But it wasn't a paying position.

I'm not a hunter, but every year around this time I empathize with my animal-slaying brethren as they fruitlessly try to persuade legislators to let them cull Virginia's herds and flocks on Sundays.

Perhaps you heard. State Sen. Ralph Northam's bill to legalize Sunday hunting passed the Senate but died in the House.

Everything about Virginia's peculiar hunting laws is quaint. Get a load of the paragraph that bans Sunday hunting:

"The following shall be unlawful: To hunt or kill any wild bird or wild animal, including any nuisance species, with a gun, firearm or other weapon on Sunday, which is hereby declared a rest day for all species of wild bird and wild animal life, except raccoons, which may be hunted until 2:00 a.m. on Sunday mornings."

Speaking on behalf of Virginia's raccoons, this isn't fair. Either Sunday is a rest day for all animals or it's not. Why is it against the law to take out one of those revolting pink-eyed possums on a Sunday morning, but it's perfectly OK to blast away at the raccoons, which we can all agree are far cuter?

Frankly, the notion of a day off for animals is more suited to a PETA proclamation than the Code of Virginia.

Yet the concept was invoked recently by the Rev. Eddy Aliff, director of the Virginia Assembly of Independent Baptists, who told Fox News: "Even the animals deserve a day of rest."

Seriously? Unless they have calendars, how do wild animals know?

With all the wackiness that goes on in Richmond, we should remind ourselves that state honchos did something right.

Years ago, they designated the third Monday in February a state holiday and dubbed it George Washington Day.

So while most of the rest of the country debates where to put the apostrophe in that manufactured Monday known as President's Day or Presidents' Day or Presidents Day, we don't have to deal with that in the Old Dominion.

Best of all, while many Americans can't figure out if they're celebrating the life of one president, or two or all of them, Virginians can smile smugly and say we know exactly whose day it is. And no, thanks, we don't want to set aside a day to honor the likes of Millard Fillmore, Richard Nixon or Jimmy Carter.

It's George Washington's day. Father of our country. Virginian.

Now let's go out there and make our first president proud by buying new towels.

Kerry Dougherty, 757-446-2306, kerry.dougherty@cox.net, PilotOnline.com/dougherty