Those who hate the nanny state should loathe abortion bill

Delete.

That’s what I hit when these three letters – “FWD” – pop up in an email.

Life’s too short to read dopey jokes, admire pet pictures or hear some recycled urban legend that’s already been debunked on Snopes.com.

Still, I’m glad I stumbled across a clever message that’s making the rounds this week, supposedly from a Virginia citizen to a legislator.

It urges the General Assembly to “take vasectomies much more seriously.” In a thinly veiled reference to the restrictions proposed for on legal abortions, it recommends that vasectomies be performed only in “a hospital setting or a facility that meets hospital standards,” that a man considering a vasectomy sign a written consent form, and that he view an ultrasound of a fetus so he understands the joys of fatherhood that he’ll be missing.

Plus, it orders that prior to the procedure “the man must have a manual prostate examination.”

Shoot, why stop there? The writer should have suggested that a doctor be forced to make a videotape of the rectal exam and stick it in the man’s medical file.

Yes, we’re going to talk about abortions today, something I rarely do, given that both sides tend to become hysterical at the mere mention of the word.

Fact is, like me you can oppose abortion and still not support the latest medical malpractice taking place around the issue in Richmond.

Don’t look now, but Virginia’s legislating geniuses, who can’t reach a consensus on Sunday hunting, have decided they’re qualified to tell doctors how to do their jobs.

If SB484 becomes law – and chances are it will – Virginia women will have to jump through an ever- increasing number of hoops before having an abortion, including a mandatory cooling-off period (from two to 24 hours) and a government-ordered, compulsory ultrasound.

Yep, lawmakers now seem to believe they’re qualified to order diagnostic tests for patients.

That’s not all. Once the ultrasound has been performed, the law will require that the patient be offered a chance to see images and listen to the fetal heartbeat.

Here comes the truly chilling as proposed initially by Vogel: A notation must be made in the woman’s medical file recording whether she looked at the image. Doctors who don’t comply will face civil penalties of $2,500.

Geez. When did something this intensely personal and painful become the business of government?

It’s also worth noting that early abortions require internal rather than external ultrasounds, which means that doctors will either perform perfunctory tummy-top scans that show nothing. Or they’ll force patients to endure a more invasive and painful procedure. Both, of course, would drive up the cost of having an abortion.

The architect of this lousy legislation, Sen. Jill Vogel of Fauquier County, has argued – reportedly with a straight face – that the measure promotes safety.

Right.

You’d think an elected official who was introducing such a monstrosity would at least have the decency to be honest about its purpose. It’s designed to do one thing: discourage abortions by meddling in the relationship between patient and doctor.

No true conservative could possibly support this measure. Those of us who rail against the nanny state and its tireless efforts to tell us what to eat, how to live, what to drive, how much we should weigh and where we can smoke should recoil in horror from this bill.

State Sen. Ralph Northam, a pediatric neurologist who represents the Eastern Shore and parts of Virginia Beach and Norfolk, was one of 18 sane senators who voted against it.

“This is a prime example of too much government,” he told me Thursday. “Patients should not be forced to undergo diagnostic procedures against their will.”

Amen.

Northam, who said he has counseled young pregnant patients and talked some out of abortions, insists that decisions about medical procedures be left to doctors and patients.

To allow the state to begin ordering medical tests is a trip down a dangerously “slippery slope,” he said.

Ironically, many of us who oppose Obamacare do so because we don’t want the government jumping between us and our doctors. We also don’t want the feds ordering us to buy health insurance. And we most definitely don’t want Big Brother forcing all employers – including Catholic hospitals and schools – to offer health insurance that covers birth control.

Look, abortions are repulsive. If you want them outlawed, vote for presidential candidates who are likely to change the makeup of the Supreme Court. Sending the state on a mission to poke through medical files and examining rooms is the wrong way to go.

Oh, and if your idea of a persuasive argument in favor of this bill involves emailed photos of fetuses, remember: I’m lightning-fast with the delete key.

Kerry Dougherty, (757) 446-2306, kerry.dougherty@cox.net, PilotOnline.com/dougherty