State's registry for potential fathers is odd but means well

The Virginian-Pilot

Ah, Virginia. The realm of registries.

First there was the sex offender registry. (A good thing.)

A couple of weeks ago, we got the dangerous dog registry. (A feeble thing.)

Now, lo and behold, we have the "I had sex with a woman!" registry. (A bizarre thing.)

In the blizzard of bills that buries Richmond every winter, many of us missed this one. Seems the General Assembly passed a law in 2006 creating a "Putative Father Registry," which was activated on July 1, 2007.

It allows a man who's had sex with a woman who's not his wife to record that erotic encounter. In case he wants to block an adoption in the future.

Yes, sir. If you've had ah, relations, with your girlfriend, your girlfriend's sister or a drunken one-night stand, you can go online and file a formal report with the state. Lotharios who aren't tech-savvy can mail in a record.

The online instructions are cheery:

"You may register as many times as you like for each potential pregnancy or different child. If you have multiple relations with the same person or more than one female that you are involved with, you need to register for each."

One problem. Last time I checked the Code of Virginia, fornication - sex engaged in by unmarried people - was a Class 4 misdemeanor. Seems the state's inviting men to confess to a crime. Hmmmm.

In fact, billboards may soon remind guys to record their illicit romances, with messages such as these from the Department of Social Services' Web site:

Do You Think You Have Fathered A Child? Could You Be A Dad? Don't Be Left Out of the Picture of Your Child's Life.

"It's not Big Brother," protested Carla Harris, spokeswoman for the Department of Social Services. "This is not the sex police."

Maybe not. But it means Virginia just created one more governmental databank. One that will contain some of the most personal information imaginable. Not to worry. We all know that confidential computer records are completely secure. Besides, at least 35 other states have done the same thing.

"New York has had a putative father registry since 1977," Harris told me.

Well, then. It must be good.

Like most bills to come out of Richmond, this one was well-intentioned, meant to streamline the adoption process.

When a single mother places her child for adoption, the law demands that an attempt be made to notify the father.

Finding Daddy can be daunting.

"We were chasing them down dark alleys," said Barbara Jones, an adoption attorney from Fairfax who helped craft the law. The child was in limbo, and the adoption was delayed while officials looked for the father, she said.

Under the new law, if a potential father hasn't put himself on the Putative Papa list, and the birth mother doesn't name him as the biological dad, he's waived his parental rights.

Frankly, I think we're being too kind to these men. Guys who don't stick around long enough to find out whether they've caused a pregnancy have terminated their paternal rights.

If they know a baby's on the way and then disappear, they aren't fathers, they're what's known as sperm donors.

In the interest of trying to find loving homes for kids who need adoptive parents, the General Assembly ought to look for ways to strip these irresponsible Romeos of their rights, not invite them to record their random copulations.